Grief, death, and politics in one episode… and somehow you’ll still laugh. The crew gets raw about losing friends, setting boundaries with addicts, and trying to find tiny pockets of joy when the world feels like too much.

Summary

This episode of Touch of Tism is a full-body exhale: messy, honest, teary, and unexpectedly hilarious. Holly, Siobhan, and Danielle sit down after an emotionally brutal stretch of February, marked by Black History Month fatigue, health struggles, and the deaths of friends—to talk about what grief really looks like when you’re still trying to show up for work, relationships, and yourself.

Holly opens up about losing her friend Nick, a trans friend who struggled with addiction and mental health, and the heavy guilt of wondering whether answering one more call or grabbing one more beer could have changed the outcome. Siobhan shares her own story of losing Wilke and the moment that finally pushed her into therapy, while Danielle revisits the long shadow of her father’s death and how grief shows up more than a decade later.

Along the way, they weave in absurd funeral stories (urns mistaken for Alexa, grandmas going commando in caskets), talk frankly about addiction, boundaries, and survivor’s guilt, and rage a bit about politics, Trump, media manipulation, and the Epstein files. But they always circle back to this: joy is still possible, and often hiding in tiny, ordinary moments.

If you’ve ever felt guilty for laughing while you’re grieving, or wondered if your boundaries make you a bad friend, this episode is a soft place to land.

Guest Bio

Siobhan
Bartender, podcast host, and creator of spaces where people can be real. Known for her quick wit and big laugh, she brings a mix of sharp observation, warmth, and just the right amount of cheeky chaos to every conversation.

Danielle
A seasoned bartender and natural storyteller with a gift for cutting through the noise. Whether she’s offering razor-sharp social commentary or pulling from her lived experiences, Danielle brings honesty, depth, and perspective that hit home.

Holly
Bartender, humorist, and heart of the crew. With her blend of comedic timing, candid honesty, and a knack for finding joy in the heavy stuff, Holly keeps the conversation grounded while making sure nobody leaves without laughing.

💡 Key Takeaways

  • Grief and guilt can coexist. You can miss someone deeply and still question every choice you made around their final days—and that doesn’t mean you’re at fault.

  • Boundaries with addicts are an act of self-preservation, not cruelty. You cannot save someone by sacrificing your sanity and safety; love can look like stepping back.

  • Joy is often tiny and ordinary. A crossing guard, a nice Lyft driver, a first rain, or a shared joke at a funeral can be lifelines when everything feels heavy.

  • Humor is a valid coping tool. Dark jokes about funerals, urns, and family chaos don’t mean you don’t care; they’re often how people survive the unbearable.

  • You are not alone—and help exists. Free and low‑cost mental health resources, crisis lines, and community spaces are real and worth reaching for.

“You might think we’re full of shit, but just remember: there is somebody out there for you. It might not be the person who comes to mind first, but they’re there.”

~ Holly

Resources and Mentions

“Grief is the price of love.”

~ Danielle

Touch of the Tism - Grief, Guilt & Finding Joy Anyway

“It’s okay to not be okay. That doesn’t make you less of a person—if anything, it makes you more of a person.”

~ Siobhan

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